


Second Thoughts

by reason_says



Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-11-05
Updated: 2006-11-05
Packaged: 2017-10-12 18:52:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/127966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reason_says/pseuds/reason_says
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A horrible approximation of Pete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Second Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge, this never happened. I am in no way affiliated with any of the real people referenced herein, and I am making no money from this.
> 
> Written for [](http://community.livejournal.com/we_are_cities/profile)[**we_are_cities**](http://community.livejournal.com/we_are_cities/), prompt 1.

**Second Thoughts. Pete/Patrick.**

  
Frantically searching through his life, for what? Something, anything to connect him to what's missing. The shoes that Hemingway destroyed last week (not that he can be blamed; he's a growing dog, after all), the shirt that Ryan borrowed and 'forgot' to return (since when does he wear men's shirts, anyway? merits further thought), the person who used to occupy the bedspace next to him (where is he?) (he's left you, Petey. everyone leaves you) (liar, you leave them; you drive them away) (I don't mean to, I never mean to but everything/one/time I try to love ends up farawayfrozendead)

He hasn't left (the house, his mind, the world) in over a week. Suddenly, absurdly glad he's taking his pills again. If he doesn't ignore them, save them up, there's no way to take them all at once. Not that he'd do that again. Would he? He promised himself, promised Patrick, but one is gone and the other is fading. Which is which? Only the sunsets can tell.

He doesn't try to be obscure, but his mind (doesn't play tricks on him, that's too obvious) twists itself around until what made sense on paper loses coherency in his mind, and always, always, always vice(versa). Patrick understood that, took his words and wrote melodies through and around them until they approximated what he had meant to begin with. He never hides his feeling well, but somehow Patrick was the only one who saw them for what they were (not what he wanted/needed them to be. singing along is all well and good but no one can understand unless the words are your own/my own/his own/our own/their own)

The songs and the words belonged to them and no one else. Music lyrics melodies tunes. Patrick thought in music, said as much, but Pete thought in blood and hearts and silence. In scorned lovers and suicides.

*knock knock knock* The door! If he's Roger, is it possible for Patrick to be his Mark and Mimi all in one? His soulmate and lover and reminder of what he might never have been? Polar opposites connected by love and blood and tears. Prince and pauper, silver and copper, nothing but a late night wi(n)dow shopper.

One step, two step, three step, four, falling through the open door. He steps out (doesn't blink in the sunlight [he has windows after all] but maybe wonders at the beauty, dimmed through the glass and curtains) and sees a man. Upon realisation, he mentally switches to 'boy', just for the Bowie reference. They are strange and enchanted, and what is he doing here?

"I was wrong."

(Bites back a dozen sarcastic responses; none of them would be true)

"You weren't. You never are."

"Sarcasm doesn't become you, Pete."

(Another lie, they both know)

"It's not! I really-- I fucked up, Patrick."

"Yeah, Pete. Yeah, you did. But that doesn't mean I was right."

"Things fall apart, Trick."

"They do. And it takes time, I know that. We have to build up trust again, and see if we're even the same people we were."

Pete recognises this speech and doesn't smile.

"It's a long, important process, and. Can we just skip it, Petey? Can you just be kissing me now?"

Finally grins. "You stole that from Buffy, you sap."

"I did, yeah. But it's true."

He agrees. And hopes one or both of them won't be shot by a crazy anti-fan in a few moments.

Even if they were, though, it would be worth it. For this moment of reconciliation.


End file.
